Posts Tagged ‘onesies’

If you’re reading this, little man or woman, know that everything is ready for you.

The car seat has been installed. The closets have been re-organized. The stroller has been assembled. The onesies have been purchased. The bottles have been washed. The crib has been ordered. The mobile has been batteried. The baby books have been read. The changing station has been set up. The tabs for “Hush Little Baby” have been downloaded. The advice of friends and family has been solicited. And the casual life we lead has been kissed goodbye.

The only thing left to do . . .

. . . is on you.

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After much thought and careful deliberation, little Nathan/Reese’s “coming home” outfit has been selected.

Why the monkey theme? Because for some reason you can’t find onesies with dolphins. And because I love monkeys. Probably more than I love human beings. Put it this way, if I were to get trapped in an elevator for three hours and had the choice of being trapped with human beings or chimpanzees, I would absolutely choose the chimpanzees — despite the threat of being pelted with feces and having my face ripped off.

Monkeys are too fascinating to me. They’re our spiritual mirrors. They’re smart, they’re stupid. They’re playful, they’re shy. They’re cute, they’re ugly. They’re calm, they’re angry. They’re giving, they’re selfish. They’re kind, they’re mean. They’re good, they’re evil.

Only it seems a lot easy to forgive the latter half of those pairs when it ain’t in a human being.

Funny how that works.

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